What is a friend supposed to do

Everybody knows, atleast they should that I fully believe in friendships and the way God places certain people into each others lives. Do you want to see people make bad decisions or risk crossing a bridge that you know is going to have a few planks missing in it? I don't think so. David and I had a long much needed talk until 4 am last night. I had to just except the fact that friendships are a give and take and trust needs to be two sided. Believe in a person too much and later accept the fact that one day you might be right, but no need to rub it in the face. It's really hard when the person on the other side, believes and trust you so much with everything in their life. When you have a great friendship it comes down to sacrifice and hope, and for right now, we both are leaning on each other for that. I did get everything worked out with two friends and we are slowly trying to find our way back to where the friendship should be. This past weekend I witnessed another God encounter, with the take over of First Baptist South Miami by Ed Young and the staff. Fellowship church Miami held it's first services with Ed, Lisa, Eric Orsen, the worship team with the sky being the limit.

living for an audience of ONE...

Ready for a Flashback???

As I was on my way to pick up David for church, I got a call from a 402 area code, that I didn't recognize. It was John and Shelly Ammerman from Omaha that live next to me,letting me know that the family reunion had begun, and that Tim and Carla Ammerman were here in Dallas at Fellowship right now for the 10am service. So I waited for David to get out of the restroom and we made it in with 6 min. to spare. I tried to call them back, but no luck. We walked by the section that we normally sit in, and 6 people stood up and yelled, "Thumper." We sat down and said our hello's and I whispered to Tim and Carla, just remember this not a normal church, and they said, "we know that, just look at the sanctuary."

The count down to when the service begins, hit 5 seconds. The house lights went dim, bellows of smoke filled the stage while an explosive light show began while the worship leader and band exclaimed, "who is ready to worship at Fellowship today?. I wish I could of been quick enough, and I would of been able to catch both of their eyeballs popping out of their sockets. Right before the message, he asked me if this was a special service, and I said, no, it is always like this, but if anything it is little toned down since Ed was gone." After the service, they both said, "well we definitely know why you moved down here to come to this church, FC would never fly in Omaha."

living for an audience of ONE...

Brothers visit the hiding place...Dallas Night Clubbing....

Well, this weekend was definitely an experience I need to talk about. So, if you are one of those straight laced d*** Christians, than you might be let down if you continue to read this. Thursday, night I was able to hangout with a really great friend of mine who is really enjoying hanging out with me, and vice versa. David has been asking for me to take him to my hiding place and go hiking on lake grapevine and we did just that. We started hanging out around 5:300pm with a quick bite at Red Robin, (I just love that place, and it was his first time) then off to lake grapevine around 7:30pish. We started a very in depth conversation about the passing of my mom and everything that I have had to deal with because of that. It was great 3 hour talk that lasted until 9pm when we realized we needed to get back, considering it was almost dark.

Friday we worked together, and Saturday night after work I went to have a few to many rum and cokes at Cool River with one of our cooks Pablo who is 38 yrs old. We quickly run to his house so he can change and then head over to one of his friends house for a Mexican birthday party for a 4 year old. I was the only gringo present, but they took really good car of me, and then he tricked me into going to this "new club" to check it out. It was called Chicas and Bonitas, lets just say we were out of there in one hour flat.

Donnie and David asked me if I would take them to their first club experience. I am the only one both of thier parents trust for all of us to hangout with, so we got to Club Uropa at 11pm. It is the only club that allows for 18-21 year olds to get into in Deep Ellum. It was funny hanging out with operations manager who is 50 and then us. David is definitely the leader of the group, and immediately was out on the dance floor macking with the honeys. He has some pretty big balls, he got shot down a few times, but towards the end, he was the chic magnet. Got to bed around 5am, David spent the night on my brand new futon, and then we went to Fellowship in the morning with another 2 hour in depth talk about his issues during lunch, and how he sees me in his life as a older brother, role model, and friend.

living for an audience of ONE...

Rub the Buddha...

I have had the great opportunity of getting to know my bosses parents over the last several months, Buddha and bear. Bear is from England and I just love her British language. Yesterday bear went in for her check up and they admitted her into the hospital with complications with her heart. Buddha comes to the store twice a week, and we always have a great talk. He is retired, and a fiery pistol at that. He is great great older senior citizen who had 5 boys and 2 girls, a good solid catholic family. My new little brother is best friends with his grandson Donnie and that is where we hangout, play basketball and swim in their inground pool, and also some late night adult swims, of course not with the grandparents.

living for an audience of ONE...

Willow Creek Community Church still going threw changes...

Update on Axis July 2, 2006 www.generationaxis.com/ImNew/axisupadate.asp For 10 years, Axis services have been devoted to helping the Next Gen connect with God through high- intensity weekend services with relevant teaching, worship and art that brings faith into a clearer focus. But, as you know if you’ve been hanging out at Axis for any length of time, it’s about much more than a weekend service. It’s about the heart you have to make a difference. It’s about community. I know that every week there are groups from Axis reaching out to help the homeless, reaching people in prison and serving the under-resourced in our neighborhoods. Whether it’s within the walls of Willow, or out in the world, Axis is devoted to giving back and to getting involved. Axis is real people really doing life together. For several months The South Barrington Leadership Team and the Axis team have been partnering together asking God to lead us to a new vision for Axis. This weekend I spoke to Axis about the next evolution of our church and of Axis. One of the key distinctives we see emerging in our church is a heart for a healthy, diverse church with an intergenerational vision. To live this vision out, we are committed to serve and embrace the 20-something community as well as the distinctives of the Axis services. Axis is not ending, but the weekly expression of the Axis service is. The vision to reach 20-somethings has not changed, but how we reach them is changing. BBQs, gatherings, and events are planned for the summer, built around the Saturday evening service meeting time. So, the next generation of the Next Gen ministry is evolving. But before I go any further, let me assure you that Willow’s commitment to 20-somethings is firm. What will that look like for you? For starters--- Beginning next weekend, (July 8), Axis is invited to do church in the main auditorium. Sections 202 and 203 in the Mezzanine will be the sections where Axis will sit. Axis will have monthly Hangout/Go-out times after the service. (July 8/Aug 19th) We’ll Hang out on the patio and BBQ, and then Go out to participate in different interests or activities. Axis will get together on August 5. House Groups, Interest Groups and Serving Groups aren’t going anywhere. During the summer, they’ll continue just the way they are. Sixty of you have signed up to serve at Habitat for Humanity’s Blitz Build on July 22-29. I’m humbled by your commitment to serve and I think you will bring energy to the rest of Willow as we make the shift to an intergenerational church. I also spoke to a key staffing change for Axis. For the last two years, Darren Whitehead has led the Axis ministry. Starting this summer, he is going to devote 100% of his energies to leading our High School ministry, Student Impact. In the interim, Steve Gillen will lead Axis during through this time of transition. The vision to reach 20-somethings has not changed. How we reach them is what’s changing. I hope you are as excited about the future here at Willow Creek as I am—because you are a big part of it! In this together— Gene Appel Lead Pastor www.willowcreek.org

living for an audience of ONE...

Running 4th in the Nation... 20 weeks of....

For the 2nd year in a row Fellowshipchurch.com has ranked 4th in the 50 Most influential churches in the nation. This summer has and will be another hot summer line up, while Ed takes his yearly break during the summer months. Fathers Day weekend was a sucessfull Papa-Palooza for the family with thousands hanging out with the family on the campus. A couple of days ago the 4th of July was unfortunatley a wash with the weather and they had to move the events inside. The last two weeks have been a little bit quietier around the home front. I have been keeping track for many weeks, and I have had someone or people over at my house, hanging out with friends in the metro, or someone visiting me every single day of the week. Basically what I am trying to tell you, I have not been alone by myself after work or on the weekend for more than 25 weeks straight. I am sure glad God has been developing patience in me. David, my new little brother is/has been gone these last two weeks, the week before last in Delaware at Phi Beta Kappa convention, and this weekend he is on the summer family vacation. Listen to that silence.

living for an audience of ONE...

Here is to 4 good years

of celebrating life, in my honor and my friend Ryan Barnharts life. July 1, 2002 we realized that we both have something in common. God wanted us to both be alive and living well and strong, and for Ryan he found Christ also on this day. Life is special, you make it want you want, and it sure can get better with time.

I have been going through a little struggle in my life, I have been slowly finding out that 5 of my closest friends have lied to me in person on the phone, to and through people. I have been walking around in a daze, going to my hiding place, and asking God-why. I think the closest that has hurt me here in Texas, is my new little brother that I have been hanging tight with since this past march. I always want people to know that I am all about the friendships, relationships and bonding with the boys. I am a very open, honest, and try to be a real-Christ follower, the best that I know how. I guess what I don't understand is why do people have to lie about crap in their life?

The flip side of the coin is that even though I might not have been physically told a fact, my intuition is pretty damn good. I know I live in Dallas, (and hopefully sometime soon that will be changing) but why does life mess with people and time drifts the closest friendships away, when you have always vowed not to let them go, and is just understood that this should be not happening. My heart is hurting, and I don't even want these people to feel like they should tell me, but come on, I already know. So, I ask myself as I lay in bed, why am I left out in the rain, and how many months will it take for my heart to hear it, do I have to wait till Christmas?, if I do, I am not sure this friendship will last.

My friend brought it to my attention that the reason he has lied to me on 3 separate occasions is because he did not want to let me down, or disappointment me. If I had a dollar for every disappointment in my life, I would be ten times wealthier than I already am. I know he looks up to me as a older brother, and wise spiritual influence. "What have I NOT done for you to believe in me, trust me, or prove to you that I am always hear with a listening ear that will not judge you, (like all those other damn Christians out there that judge you before you even get introduced to them)", is what I asked him. He told me, "that I am one of the most intimidating people he has ever met", "are you kidding me, RIGHT?", I looked at him Saturday morning with confusion, and disbelief. So I ask my GM, "am I intimidating?, and she told me, "you are the 2nd most intimidating, next to my boyfriend. If I am, I sure as hell do not know it. I thanked David for bringing it to my attention, and told him, "we both have something to work on", and he said, You bet WE do. Bro, you want me to raise the bar, well Randall I want you to also." Life is always about raising the bar, and striving to reach the mark. I conclude with this...

If your to busy for your closest friends and family to just make a simple 2min call, text message, or email, then you need to stop wasting your pathetic attempt at life to realize you really need to stop and smell the roses and quit letting yourself exercise your excuse that your job is right now your only pathetic attempt to enjoy life. People don't let your friends and family that care about you the most, move on down the road. I guess I am finding out who my true friends really are, be careful it just might surprise you-unfortunately.

peace...

living for an audience of ONE...

Uptown Moves Downtown

Life has often been compared to a race, a roller coaster and a box of chocolates. But no one refers to life as a spectator sport. This weekend Ed Young showed us how we can discover an amazing life of purpose and power when we finally decide to move beyond the bleachers. It was the Grand Opening of the Downtown Dallas for a brand new satellite campus, and we had over 2,000 show up for this exciting event for FC and Town and Country Campaign. You can check out all the pictures and the exciting campus that will be reaching people for Christ in a whole new way. Stepping out of the bleachers, heck I am mowing the grass, watering, and seeding. Sometimes you just got to get a little dirty for God, and right now it's really muddy for me in my world. The New launch is still coming, so stay tuned...

living for an audience of ONE...

What to do when you hit rock bottom?

Since God has directed me to be a humanitarian, and my heart of compassion is always alive, I had to take a friend out to dinner for one last time. I want to introduce you to my friend Bennot, he is 22, no parents, no siblings, no grandparents, no car, no job, no apt, and of course no money, but the two good things he has is God and his 4 year old son. I get Bennett, I understand him and I certainly can relate to him a little. I am so happy that the Navy accepted him and he is leaving this Thursday June 22. You might ask, why no life, well he has hit rock bottom, and he is ok with that, his faith has spurred me on to keeping on going, life is ok, and other people might have it a little bit worse off than what you think is devasting to you, but in Bennott mind, your life is just a walk in the park. I hugged him goodbye after hanging out with him for 5 hours and I told him, God is starting over with you, and you need to start a new life with Him and begin to make one for you and your son, from here on out Bennott, everything you do is for your son." Good Luck bro, I wish all the success in the world and I hope God will bring our paths back together.

living for an audience of ONE...

Hang with the boys...

Well this is really getting exciting, however tonight's loss was a huge disappointment. I decided to show my love for some of the friends I have in my life. Afif, David and Donnie met at my house tonight at 5pm and we jumped into the car and headed downtown to a really nice steak house in the west end. Afif was really excited, so excited that he was leaning forward on his chair, and it gave way and he landed square on his ass, as the chair slid backwards a few feet. We all could not stop laughing so hard. We walked into the AAC for the "Mavs Watching party", they were really surprised and very appreciative of my kind gesture. We had great seats, but David talked us into going down closer to the floor for a better view. The last 5 minutes was so exciting that David was the first one to rip off his shirt, then Donnie, and a minute later Afif did as well, and they all were swing them in the air. I will save your fingers, hell no I did not even contemplate taking off my shirt, next year, my shirt will be coming off, along with my 50 pds that David has already helped me to lose.

Peace

living for an audience of ONE...

Can priest drink... The World Cup is On.

Well, growing up in a heavy catholic town of faith, I was always use to the men of the cloth not drinking, but I guess in today's culture, they can, they are, and boy can they "Get R Don". I have waited on a few of them. Most of the priest just walk up to the bar and look at me, and wait for me to ask them what they want for a drink, and usually I just say hello, and move on to another customer, and then they want to know when I am going to wait on them. Most of them are surprised to find out that the reason I don't ask them for a drink is because I tell them, "most people like you, I didn't think were allowed to drink", so I ask you, are they? I guess in Costa Rica, Brazil, and last but not least Mexico they are allowed.
One of my owners has played in a couple World Cup soccer games, and business has picked up and of course right now everybody is watching soccer for the us and "football" for the rest of the world.
living for an audience of ONE...

KK is getting older.

Big D and his best friend Aaron

This weekend my girl is celebrating her birthday and I was not sure where I was going to take the troops. It was 100' all weekend, and they just wanted to drink, and I knew I would be the DD. Karla and her friend Padma have never been down to Sundance Square in Downtown Ft.Worth. "You two have never been, Where are going there", I said. It was crazy and there was a jazz festival scheduled and of course no one told me when I was making the plans. We all got there around 11pm and each of the bars were packed so we ended up going to Bennigans, nothing new. We stayed there until 2am, and then went to a after hours party at a friends house.

Now if you want the gossip and all the juicy details of who puked 4 times, how many fights took place and who went wild, you will have to log on to my other web page, this is the "Christian one." I got home around 4 am and as I was walking into my apt. I kept on hearing these weird noises, ones that would never come from my apt. Next time, I want you to give me some sort of warning, like a sock on the door something, wow I didn't fall asleep until around 10am. You guessed it, not on this web page. Tonight is a very big game for the Dallas Mavs and I am hoping we can pull it off. So,if you are around the neighborhood, and have time, stop on by, you know we are watching the MAVS school the shack attack. U r going down, buddy. Peace

living for an audience of ONE...

Did you survive 6-6-06??? GOT Mavs Mania??? When you know!?

Tuesday down here in Texas, people were going nuts trying to avoid letting there newborns not be blessed by entering the world on this evil day?? People not going out on the streets, looking over there shoulders, and avoiding the crowds. Give me a break people, but I guess you just never know.
People are going crazy considering they have not had an NBA experience like this in 25 years. I will be having my first ever NBA Mavs party at my apartment and the troops will be here, I hope they will bring the beer.
Probably for the last two months or so, I have been home sick. When you know something is going on back at home, but you are stuck here in Texas, and you are just out of the loop it gets very frustrating. I am not dumb, and I certainly have been around the block a few times over and over again. I love my friends so much, and soon I will have one more friend, in which right now, my stomach and soul is so excited, that it is literally killing me inside. I want so much to hug, kiss, and wrap my arms around my friends, but for right now, I can only sit back and laugh at the situation, because I know.
living for an audience of ONE...

Busted Chicago wide open....

We arrived in Chi-town around 9am on Thursday June 1st. Jumped on the "EL" towards downtown Chicago, from right off the bat we were relieved that people would be so gracious to help us out, since they definitely could tell we were not from there. The hotel that we booked was the downtown Hilton Hotel and Towers, we had a lake Michigan view on a high floor, and we got a sweet deal. We got off on the wrong stop 10 blocks from the hotel, and caught a bus to atleast find the hotel, we stored our bags with the bell man and hit the streets running. Within 5 hours under the cloudy dismal, spitting lite drizzled day we took a nap from 5pm-7. My buddy Afif woke me up asking me what was wrong with my face? I jumped into the bathroom to realize that I look like a damn lobster. Burnt to a crisp, and of course had to make our way 7 blocks south to the closest Jewel-Osco for some sunscreen. We found this awesome pizza-Italian pub just two blocks from millennium park with $5 u call it martinis. We had a few too many, and then made our way to the bar to watch the mavs school the suns, a few more drinks, shots, and then it was time to meet my grade school best friend Randy Inserra. Afif decided to take a nap, and then meet up with us around 11pm. We finally made it to Rush street, got kicked out of 3 bars, in one fight, watched Afif puke on a cop car right in front of Wrigley Field and stopped him in mid stream of kissing a few random people that he did not know. Missed going to jail for PI's with a sweet talker in letting us go home. Then we jumped into a taxi cab that was a"HBO-Taxi Cab confessions car", that I signed the release form at the end to seal the deal, only because Afif ran his mouth the whole time, to this day, he still thinks so. ha
Friday morning we slept in till noon and went and hit the downtown riverfront and all around, we found this awesome little Italian bistro, and then meet up with my two sisters, and nieces around 3pm. We went shopping, on a riverboat tour, lots of good laughs and enjoyed a nice relaxing late dinner at the Chicago House of Blues, and then they headed back to Kenosha. My buddy's client flew up in his private jet, and rented some Dodge Vipers that were tooled around the city in. Awesome.
Saturday morning I scheduled a breakfast talk-counseling session with one of my old prof's from GU. I had a great two hour in depth talk with Dr. C and really was able to get a lot of advice from him. Thank your Dr. C. During lunch we cruised up to Kenosha to my sisters house for her daughters family & friend BBQ from noon-4pm. After we all had a quick nap, we settled in for the night to watch the mavs final winning game, then off to the Wine Knot for an awesome glass of wine that turned out to be very relaxing.
Sunday, we awoke up and headed to Willow Creek for church and then to go see my niece graduate from high school, and whizzed on back to Midway airport to fly home by 9pm.

All in all, it was a great vacation and we will be doing it again very soon at the end of summer, however destination will be top secret, since this web page is read all over the world. You will soon find out why. Peace randall
living for an audience of ONE...

Chi-town or bust

This past weekend has flown by, and I made the decision to not go to church, ya I know I am a sinner. Memorial day weekend is always parent/child dedication and I just did not want to sit through 500 screaming babies in church. Sorry. However I did hangout with my new little brother David and we all watched the Mavs keep on scoring to a victory.
I am definitely ready to go to the windy city for our first ever "millionaire weekend". We have four going and we will be living like rock stars. Believe it. My best friend from Texas and I are leaving tomorrow at 7am. I will let you know all the juicy details. I promise.
living for an audience of ONE...

Summer is here...A brand new project on the horizon?

can you feel it, if you are in Texas you sure can. I have been busy with some old friends, my regular friends, and making new ones. I just don't understand why the new ones are still alot younger than me. I have been hanging out with a bartender friend of mine and his best friend which is the owners nephew. He just graduated from high school, a little late, but still graduated and also in college. This kid is an awesome person who still lives at home, and the mom is literally sucking the life out of him. Both parents are glad that David and Donnie are hanging with me and encourage it. They have been over around 9 times watching the Dallas Mavs with Afif and I. Recently, I asked them what they expect out of this relationship and they both said at different conversations, " we love hanging out with you, cause your a lot fun, a very wise person, a positive person who always encourages us, a very good friend, and we both look at you as an older brother that we never have had. " I was very flattered and also humbled. I have hung out with David a lot more than Donnie, because of schedule conflicts. I hung out with David all day Monday, Thursday, Friday. We had a great talk over sno-cones, dinner, volleyball, and then the mavs game. They both are Christians, however Donnie is a new Christian, and has not yet been brought up in the Christian faith, that will be our summer project for David and I. They are going to both start coming to Fellowship with me, and you know I love that. They will be staying at my apartment while I am in Chicago for 4 days this upcoming weekend.

I have been working on a new project that will get rolled out 4th of July weekend, and trust me it is going to be a hot summer sizzler. To kick off my new project, I have hired, and asked a friend of mine of who is a Christian rapper to spin little track for me. MORE TO COME July 4th.

IS IT GETTIN HOT IN HERE? YOU WILL SOON FIND OUT!!!

living for an audience of ONE...

Meet my friend....

Everyone-from knee high to tree high-is an author. In fact, whether you realize it or not, you are in the process of writing a best-seller. But for your story to take on the character and potential God has in mind, you have to move beyond the first page. We learned how to turn past that first page. And when we do that, we can transform an average story into the story of our lives. So, with that I want to introduce you to one of my friends Janay MacDonald, that I know personally from FC, and you can gain perspective on how her story was unwrapped, and how we all can get our own stories out, one person at a time. That is what life is about, sharing your story, learning and growing from it, all the while gaining knowledge to apply it to your own life. GO MAVS

living for an audience of ONE...

Want to see me on t.v.???? FC-Uptown UPDATE...DaVinci Code is a dud...

**** I am sharing some cool info. NOT BOOSTING MY EGO, a couple of my friends said I should.**** The last couple months Ed was inspired by his favorite music group to be a little more edgy in church, and so he created the first ever Christian mosh pit in a church, and it was a huge success. Everybody was and still is talking about one of the fastest growing churches in the nation. So I ask you, have you yet checked out the past sets, stage designs that we are known for??? Want to see me on national television and in the pit, then you better tune into Ed Young t.v. to see me in the first ever Christian mosh pit in a church. Trying to not keep God in a box, we don't even attempt to go there. Creative, Innovative, Compelling, and cutting edge is the best way to explain our explosive growth. Mark your calendars, a brand new campus is opening up in the downtown-uptown Dallas area on June 25 and you can check out the construction process right here. The word is getting out. Dan Brown and Tom hanks have done a injustice to Christians and evangelical alike all over the world, it will spur on conversation-yes, but the outcome will be taking us a few steps back.

living for an audience of ONE...

Do you know what everybody is talking about??

It's about Jesus, and all you have to do is just open up an ear to hear all the chatter. Mary Hart is in London for the world premier, every radio station is pushing it. Alot of mega churches are catering their next few weekends services about it. You want to know what, Fellowship is not mentioned a thing about it. Ed, has expressed concern about engaging in conversation about it, or his thoughts are" don't even bother reading the book, you will be waisting your time." I want to know what all the hum is about, because I just dont get it. Here are a few churches discussing this hot topic...Willow Creek Community church Saddleback Church Point of Grace Church

living for an audience of ONE...

Shania Twain @ FC...Time to let go...

Well, I must say that my church never ceases to amaze me. Lisa Whelchel-aka-"Blair", from the Facts of Life made another Mother's Day guest appearance to encourage mothers. She also kicked off the building campaign of the first weekend to give your best gift-first-this weekend. She is incredible author, speaker, teacher, actor and mother of 3. She does a lot of traveling and speaking engagements. She recently came down to hear the casting vision for "Town and Country" about a month ago, since she is still an active member of FC. This weekend a all girl group sang for all the moms a Shania Twain song, "This one is for the girls. Well onto other news, I have been successful in helping a friend "which we all know", find a pyschatrist, I just couldn't do it any longer. I sure am hoping that he will stick with it to the very end. I love this friend of mine, but we both know that he has a chemical imbalance in his head, that he just can't let go of. We are still very close friends, and he is still going on vacation with me and my best friend from grade school, Randy Inserra at the end of the month. I have been doing a lot of soul searching, and my heart breakes about letting go of things that I just love to hold on to. I have a couple of friends that I just wonder why we are friends. We use to be really close, but have slowly drifted away, I think that is one little thing I just don't like about Christianity. You have to completely put your whole faith and beliefs in a God that you can't see, but yet you trust Him enough to get you threw each day. When He says it is time to move on, you better do it, and make it that much easier later on down the road.

living for an audience of ONE...