Can you say...

I am sucking the life out of you. Why Yes I can. The person who has been doing this for, oh I would say around 8 years, would be me. I now know what it is like to be on the receiving end of this. I have been friends with this person for over 2 years, and really hanging tight since last May, but lately my blinders have been removed. I now realize he is sucking the life out of me, literally. Sometimes it can be really hard, but I try and wake to a new day, but I am still drained from the night before. A couple of days ago he sent me a very disturbing text message. He is at the end of his rope, his father has been passed away, his mom is back at home out of the country for a month. He is supposed to be the man in the house. He is not used to American culture, he hates college, wants a girl friend, but does not need one, and he is a little suicidal. I give and give and give, and it is still not enough. I make time for him and it is not ever enough. I have nothing more to give, except hope I look at him and see myself in his cold, lost and hopeless eyes. The one thing that keeps me going is the hope. One person in my life that always continues to give me hope is my best friend. That's the one thing that has upheld me to my faith, there is hope. Many of you know that I am on to a new chapter in my life. Chapter 3 brings me to my knees, brings me tears of joy, and brings me to my hiding place. There I find life, strength, peace, and good dose of love, acceptance, forgiveness. The hiding place that is one of my 3rd homes, is here is in DFW. One day I want to bring you there, we will travel down 121, get on Hwy 26, turning between Texas Opryland and the Dallas Cowboys Golf course, well cross the bridge and you can hang with me at my Texas hiding place. I have found my own little sanctuary of hope, it on the north side of Lake Grapevine, you might find me there a couple days of the week, praying, crying, reading my new book, requesting God's presence right there and now maybe someday you can step into my real world, and see hope for yourself. **** This is dedicated to people, friends and family alike who might have the same situation. You might be one of the lights at their dark tunnel who can bring them some hope. Matthew you have always pointed me in the right direction, you always encourage me to find God in every situation, you always encourage me to find peace with in my soul. You always showed me tough love, pressured me to step away from myself, and you always love me unconditionally like Christ has loved you. Look for hope in every moment of life, strive to show them what your made of, keep encouraging the ones that need encouragement and one day you will see your rewards come to fruitation. Matthew, you introduced me to the L. Botanical Gardens in Omaha, I can't wait to introduce to my Oasis of Hope.****

living for an audience of ONE...